An extract from Henry Winshaw's imaginary interview (an appendix to Jonathan Coe's novel A carve up!)



Alina Samko 4^th year, English Language Faculty, Minsk State Linguistic University An Extract from Henry Winshaw’s Imaginary Interview (An appendix to Jonathan Coe’s novel What A Carve Up!) «Отрывок из интервью Генри Уиншо» - часть творческого проекта, выполненного студенткой после прочтения романа Джонатана Коу Какое надувательство!

Journalist: Mr. Winshaw, how would you account for the fact that your family has gained immense power in quite a short a period of time? Sometimes, I have an impression that I live under the monopoly of Winshaws. You are in Parliament, you, the Winshaws, control the money of the country, you mould our minds with your newspapers, you feed us - sorry for that - with some trash... You are everywhere.

Henry: Yes, my dear. You can t be closer to the truth. The recipe is pretty simple: you take a big bowl, pour in there a good deal of nepotism, add a handful of toughness and severity, then mix it all carefully, pick out the seeds of morals and virtues, don't forget to place there some greed, cold-bloodedness, lust for money and power, a pitch of madness, spices to taste... You cook it for a number of years in a proper temperature - and here you go! The dish is ready. Journalist: I have a mounting feeling that you don't have a high regard to your family...

Henry Winshaw: Well, yes and no. I didn't commission you, darling. It was YOU who were burning to hear the truth, you opened a can of worms, so be ready to face something obnoxious. Yes, I've never pretended that I love my dear relatives. Love is a vague notion for me if you must know... There was one true love in my life - Margaret Thatcher. But she disillusioned me, now I feel distaste towards her. And towards others. If I ever imitated any kind of love or loyalty it was merely for the sake of appearances, mostly for the media.

Journalist: Would you claim hypocrisy to be a typical feature of the powerful people in Great Britain?

Henry: I would call it adjustment. You simply choose a position, which saves your skin. Life is all about the survival-of-the-fittest. Or the wittiest. If you call it hypocrisy I don't mind.

Journalist: But what about ideals, about serving humanity? Your family, all of you, this way or other are in charge of what's going on in the society. Say, you adopt laws in Parliament, Hilary Winshaw shapes the public opinion, Thomas is literally in charge of our money, Mark, as it appeared, provides weapons for the military actions overseas...

Henry: You see, darling, with the lapse of time it will become obvious to you, that serving humanity is nothing but bullshit. Utter bullshit. The philosophy of Winshaws is that the road to Hell is paved with good intentions.

Journalist: Sounds quite sensational from a backbenc... Oh, I mean, from a bachelor. Its your academic degree, isn't it?

Henry: Oh, yes. We all have graduated from prestigious Universities and we are remarkable for our intelligence. Except for one outcast, you know... Unfortunately, one of us is isolated in a loony house. Journalist: You mean Tabitha Winshaw if I don’t take you wrong? Are you really inclined to believe in her insanity?

Henry: I tell you what, I neither believe nor doubt It. It's CONVENIENT for me and for all of us that she's in the institute. This is the system, and those who try to rise against it just get swept away. Journalist: But don't you ever happen to have the feeling of repentance? Your whole family have blood on your hands, I dare say....

Editor’s note: Unfortunately, we will never learn what Mr.Winshaw’s answer was, because the girl, a young journalist from a London newspaper was lying dead on the floor of her rented room on the outskirts of the city with a piece of paper carrying the above interview in her clenched hand.

If only she hadn't opened the can of worms...