Non-accidental meetings: how technologies are known through dating and relationships in the postmodern society

In this paper, an attempt to understand modern romantic relationships influenced by technology is made. According to Z. Bauman and E. Giddens, relations in modern societycan be characterized as “liquid love” or “confluent love”, which are very dynamic. It is noted that the primary stages of building relationships are mediated by technical means, and the partners communicate remotely, according to the “subject - means - subject” scheme. At the same time, the technologies themselves, imperceptibly for users, can control the choice of a partner and limit the range of persons with whom he or she can get acquainted, and as a result, establish a relationship. This is the manifestation of the technical side of rational love, based on the choice of a “suitable life partner”.In this case, the theory of rational choice is absolutized, and as a result a partner that meets certain parameters is selected: on the one hand, attractive for the subject, and on the other, equal in social status and level of attractiveness for others. In addition, online dating supports a person’s desire for safety and comfort, as technology mitigates failures, and rational risk is only partially present. A person gets the opportunity to explore the Other before a personal meeting, and in some cases even before they meet and begin virtual communication, which is associated with greater openness of users on the global Internet, active placement of various content and personal information. Thus, the search and attraction of a partner in dating services and virtual social networks reflects such tendencies of present as digitalization, macdonalization and virtualization.