Married relationship and parental work in training youth: pedagogical-psychological approach

In this article, we would like to stop on the problem: parental work`s affecting in training children. Parental work in training children must under construction on love, trust, worship, mutual understanding, and obedience and so on. It is known, hatred excites contentions, but love covers all limitations. Because, love doesn`t envy and isn`t extolled; love isn`t proud and love doesn`t look for itself; love doesn`t peeve; love doesn`t think about evil; love doesn`t rejoice at lie and will be glad for truth; love covers and trusts everything; love always hopes. So, according to scientists, humanity is summation of moral and psychological internals in personality expressing relation to a person supreme value. This peculiarity of personality reveals in displaying kindness, goodwill and friendliness; in readiness to help other person and attentiveness to him (her); in reflection, that is ability to understand to and to put himself (herself) on his (her) place; in tolerance to alien opinions, beliefs and behavior.

According to modern view, training is considered as progress of purposeful and consciously controlled by socialization like family training, religious training and school training. These socializations have several differences in different periods of child`s development. One of the most important differences taking place of child`s development in all periods is training acts as mechanism of management of progress of socialization. At the same time, it is impossible to overestimate also the role of social factors in formation of a child as personality. Aristotle wrote that soul isn`t used up the book of nature; experience applies on its pages its inscriptions. D. Locke considered that person is born with pure soul like a board covered with wax. And training writes on this board what it will like. French philosopher K. A. Helvetius taught that all people possess identical potential for intellectual and moral development by nature and distinction in psychological peculiarities is based on various influences of environment and different educational influences [4, 275].

Any action of person causes an assessment from people around if it affects other people in a varying degree and it isn`t indifferent for interest of society. We estimate it as good or bad, correct or wrong, fair or unfair. Thus we use concepts of moral. According to how moral is mastered and accepted by a person, it is possible to judge about his (her) level of moral. In other words, moral is personal characteristic unifying following peculiarities and properties as kindness, decency, honesty, truthfulness, justice, diligence, discipline, collectivism regulating individual behavior of person.

However, a wise son always pleases his father; a silly son distresses his mother. A wise son listens to admonition of his father; a riotous son doesn`t listen to accusation. A wise son gladdens his father; a silly person neglects his mother. A wise son observes the law; a son who is thick with spendthrifts shames his father. A son ruining his father and expelling his mother is considered dishonorable, disgraceful and ignominious. If a son robs his parents and says ‘it isn`t a sin’, he is considered an accomplice of robbers. If a son slanders his parents, his lamp will go out among deep darkness. Thus, it is grief and sorrow if somebody brings up a silly child and a silly child`s father never pleases. So, parental work in training of future generation should be so chaste and careful. If to direct a young man at the beginning of his way, he won`t evade from it when he grows old. Tsar Solomon gave such important and significant admonitions for youth about it:

Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life. Put away perversity from your mouth; keep corrupt talk far from your lips. Let your eyes look straight ahead, fix your gaze directly before you. Make level paths for your feet and take only ways that are firm. Do not swerve to the right or the left; keep your foot from evil [1, 684].

Parents must take into consideration teaching children to talk to others who are around them in training their children. Because, a person`s tongue does much though it is a small part of a person`s body. As a tongue is fire, none of people can`t tame. So each person should be dexterous for hearing and he should be calm and peaceful on his words and anger. If someone doesn`t commit sin in his (her) words, that person is considered perfect and he (she) can bridle all his (her) body. Culture communication in children demands formation of trust, kindness to people. It will happen when politeness and attentiveness become norms of communication around children.

A person loving wisdom gladdens his father; a man who is in relation with whores wastes his property. Honey flows from mouth of alien woman; her speech is softer than chrism, but its consequences are terrible like a two edged sword; her feet go in the direction of death. Warning youth, Tsar Solomon gave following admonition against adultery:

Now then, my sons listen to me; do not turn aside from what I say. Keep to a path far from her, do not go near the door of her house, lest you give your best strength to others and your years to one who is cruel, lest strangers feast on your wealth and your toil enrich another man's house [1, 684].

Parents should bring up their children in a spirit of industry avoiding laziness. Because, lazy hand makes poor a person; a hand of diligent enriches him. A collecting man during summer is considered a reasonable son; a sleeping man during harvest is considered a dissolute son. It seems parental work in training and forming children as a personality should be directed on an industry. Labor training of a child begins from labor duties and tasks in his family. Labor was and remains as a necessary and important resource to develop psyche and moral of personality. Labor must become natural physical and intellectual necessity for a child. However, it is necessary to say lazy youth the following admonition of Tsar Solomon:

Go to the ant, you sluggard; consider its ways and be wise! It has no commander, no overseer or ruler, yet it stores its provisions in summer and gathers its food at harvest. How long will you lie there, you sluggard? When will you get up from your sleep? A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest--and poverty will come on you like a bandit and scarcity like an armed man [1, 685].

Summarizing we`d like to say that family consists of parents and their children. A woman only belongs to her husband; a man also belongs to his wife. Marriage between a husband and a wife should be pure. To live in a happy family is better than to live in a family there isn`t joy and happiness. So, a husband and a wife shouldn`t distress, insult and hurt one another. It is so important in a family.

They should spend their time for each other. To the purpose, loyalty, understanding, trust, patience, sincerity, care is important in a family. A man should love and appreciate his wife; a woman should respect and trust her husband. First of all, she should be always obedient to him. It is necessary when a child sees how his father loves and appreciates his mother and how his mother respects and trusts his father. Watching the relationship between his parents, a child will learn to love, to appreciate, to respect, to understand and to trust people living around him. When a child grows up, he will be grateful to his parents for their training. Because, he was learnt by his parents how to live right. Thus, human properties are considered so important in training and forming children as personality. And bringing up and forming children as personality is considered a parental duty before society and a state.